Over the past two weeks, I have really been allowing the Lord to work on me in the areas that aren’t “so pretty.” You know, those broken places that only God and I know about… two in particular: One I will talk about now (my husband) and the other in a later post Lord willing. My last blog was written in anticipation on my wrestling with God over these particular issues but in reality, I found myself wrestling not just God but the devil as well as myself. Freedom was the prize I sought but was I willing to go the distance to receive it?
Doing something I’ve never done, I called someone whom I’ve never spoken with in person. She allowed me to share my concerns on both issues and she asked me very specifically about my husband, our relationship and its demise. I began to tell her the “reader’s digest” version and she became very quiet. After I finished, she said, “I keep seeing knots. It’s almost like the [two issues] you speak of are tied together. Everything is knotted together.” She went on to say that she didn’t really understand what it meant but prayed for understanding for both of us. We hung up and I began to seek the Lord on why they were tied together. Could it have been because I love my husband and I love the other issue in my life (kept private for a reason)? Could it be that both bring out the WORST in me? Or maybe I’m just not willing to let either go?
The crazy part about what she saw is that on my past blogs, I’ve talked about being “tied in knots” because my husband is an unknown factor in my life. The reason why everything is linked together is because the devil is using my husband as an open door to come in my life and trample on everything I hold dear. So my prayer all last week was, “God, untie the knots!” (Really, I’m going somewhere with this I promise!)
Sunday as I drove to church God reminded me of a song I used to listen to a lot. It was one of my favorites called “Let Go” by the Christian alternative band, Red. I downloaded it and began to let it saturate my soul. As I was jamming along, God said, “let go.” Just plain and simple, matter-of-fact… as if He and I were conversing beside each other. Almost shocked at the simplicity of His statement, I replied with a certain smugness, “If only it were THAT simple.”
“Why isn’t it THAT simple?” -God-
“….. umm, I dunno…. It’s just not, God. It’s not “simple” to let someone or something go!” So out of utter defiance (trying to prove Him wrong), I blurted out, “I let him go God!” … My son looked at me crazily and then turned his attention back to his movie. There was something different about this statement than the previous ones I had made in the past… Only one thing changed, I actually meant it this time. As I drove through the streets of Texarkana with tear-filled eyes, God began to remove the fear of letting go from my life. I began to realize that I HAVE to let go of the things I cannot control. For too long, I have tried to hold on to the sand falling fast between my fingers. For too long, I have grasped at the wind and rain just to find my life torn apart from the wind and my spirit drowning in the rain. Enough is enough.
Sometimes the hardest thing to do is let go of someone who means more to you than you could ever imagine. Sometimes the hardest thing to do is to let go of that which has become so comfortable to you, it is practically second nature. I just want to encourage you today… “Let Go…”
Let go of that wayward loved one.
Let go of that situation you cannot control.
Let go of that hurt you have bottled up inside you.
Let go…and let God! Let Him bind up your wounds. Let Him heal your heart. Let Him do what He does best: Be God!
One of my son’s favorite movies is Finding Nemo. We were watching it a few days ago and there is one scene in particular that I want to point out. Please click on the following link to go to a clip on YouTube: http://youtu.be/O_u4h_N2lTw I’m not going to explain the whole movie to you but basically Marlin cannot let go. He is afraid of life biting him in the tail again and taking everything that he once held dear. His fear clouds his faith. Dory, on the other hand, has faith that the whale knows what he’s doing. Dory knows she’s fixing to be swallowed but she believes the whale when he says, “Let go, everything is going to be alright.”
I’m here to tell you, “Let go, everything is going to be alright….” When all hope seems lost and you feel like you are drowning, God gave you a promise:
“for He [God] Himself has said, I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor
leave you without support. [I will] not, [I will] not, [I will] not in any degree leave
you helpless nor forsake nor let [you] down (relax My hold is on you!).
Heb 13:54 (AMP)
Let go and have faith that your Daddy God knows what He is doing.
#sharingHispeace
Sharing His Peace 